Writing a Comic Book Poem – Unflow

Unflow poises a question at the start, but it is the protagonist who is asking it. ‘If only I knew what I wanted to do, when I was so much younger.’

The narrator asks if there would have been a difference to their life if they what they wanted to earlier in life.

We are then told that this has caused the narrator to spend his time running away from problems. I wanted Unflow to be a journey, where we follow the character as he runs away from his problems. I also wanted the text to be informal and conversational so the reader could possibly identify with the character more – as if we are having an intimate and personal conversation.

Unflow

If only I knew what I wanted to do
When I was so much younger
Instead I’ve got to run, run, run
and try, try, try
until one day when I come back home
All I see is smiling
And the smiling is all I really need

I want to tell you something right now
I’m generally feeling sorry somehow
I don’t think you even hear me and
I don’t think that you could care less.

This reads like I’m still something like 16.
This reads like I am still a so so sad little child
And it is so obvious that I do things in the wrong order
As if the right way around is a million miles away
A little chill in the dark and it comes
The three hours spent alone was heaven
Walking seemingly all on over an open world game
and taking leaping steps up from the back
as I struggle and struggle to get on home
Is there another way to split open her heart?
My spine straightens and brain swells.
If it goes on it will turn and turn
and engage me down the path with…
With a forever repetition
I’m getting tired and I need some sleep
but all I can hear is this shouting.
The problem is that it is seeping in
And all the people are reading this
And none of it really actually matters
So I Unflow

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About Comic Book Poems

I am a writer and artist who likes to work with poetry, illustration, film and animation.
This entry was posted in Comic Book Poems, Series 3, Writing a Comic Book Poem and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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